One of the most harmful habits and one of the hardest habits to break is the habit of being right all the time. By being right one sets the other up to be wrong, one instigates conflict from the outset. This way one is always at loggerheads with someone about something. Others who like to be right all the time will spot the challenge you pose and will rise to it time and time again.
It it a good place to start meditation practice “in action”. Spot the moments when “being right” arises. Spot the ensuing thought patterns as they manifest and solidify into the sure knowledge you are right. Spot what follows: there is a rise of tension and even anger as you prepare for battle. Your body runs on stress when you are right all the time.
Using a meditation like this one slowly becomes more and more aware of these patterns, or habits of thinking that lead to negative emotions, actions and words. By becoming more aware or awake one recognises earlier the signs of trouble and stands guard against the mistaken attitude and then by chipping away at the habit with this awareness, you one day find you no longer need to be right. Instead being is itself a pleasure and a joy.
Letting go can sometimes be hard and sometimes be easy. It all depends on how attached you are to your ideas. For quite a while I hosted freedomforall.net on a free package with the domain name seller I used to purchase the domain. With only 10Mb of storage I often had to let go of whole chunks of my efforts to make way for the new. Occassionally there was a slight heart wrenching as I would watch a piece of writing I particularly valued fall off the end.
Today I added commenting by haloscan to the site, exploring options as I try and move from Blogger to Moveable Type as my publishing tool. I don’t like Blogger anymore because it is not flexible enough. I want to add a list on the sidebar of all previous posts and blogger won’t do it. I want to do this because when I did it manually for a while people found more they wanted to read and stayed longer. Visitors read three times the number of pages per visit when I provided them with this easy way to find stuff.
And now I discover that by installing haloscan I have had to let go of all previouse comments because haloscan can’t import them from blogger. I liked the comments. There was useful feedback and some interesting writing therein. So if you have commented and you find it has dissappeared, accept my appologies, and join me in letting go.
It’s not the sun and the clouds outside that make the weather, it’s the sun and the clouds inside. When I find myself in those moments of clear blue sky awareness that fill me and empty me simultaneously I discover what I am. When I let the clouds of “who I am” obscure the sun and the sky I am not only acting from habit but lost and unable to see anything with clarity.
Listen to this post